15 August 2006

Slow children at play

When I was a wee lad, I used to misread those signs. Without punctuation, it looked like a single declarative sentence. Of course, I wasn't too old before I realized it wasn't one statement, but an imperative followed by a declaration.

When I became old enough to drive, I gradually began to realize that there is a sign that means there are very slow (and probably retarded) people playing. A sign that says "get around this idiot, now!" A sign that says "I'm slower than a set of disembodied knuckles in a vintage Caddy."

If you see this sign, for GOD'S SAKE CHANGE OUT OF THE LANE!!!!

What is it about Harley riders? Whether on their crappy bikes - which, granted, doesn't happen too often what with them being in the shop nine days out of ten - or driving their shitty midsize pickups with multiple Harley window stickers prominently displayed, they can be counted on for one thing: moving slower than Floyd Landis without the testosterone.